Loving My Chaos

Living an Adventure with EE, Multi Food Allergies and Special Needs Treasures from God!

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An Answered Prayer and another Change in Yang’s Diet!

Been out of touch for a while things have been going quite crazy around here, but we also had some wonderful news. Yang was scoped a few weeks ago and he came back completely free of Eosinophils. What does that mean? It means that the meds he has been taking have helped and he is able to add something to his diet. We have decided to add back wheat. Yang for the first time had a dairy free pizza with a real crust in over a year. He was so excited! I want to thank everyone who has been praying for him. Since we are adding wheat I will not be doing the gluten-free as much right not. In 6 months if he will be tested again. If his eosinophils counts have changed and are back he will most likely not be able to eat wheat again for a long time. SO for the next 6 months I will be focusing on his other food allergies of turkey, dairy, egg, shellfish, fish, celery, soy, nuts and peanuts.  For those of you who are gluten free I will make a page of all of the products I liked to use.

A change in diet happens a lot for us when living with a child and a husband with EE.  I think one of the hardest things besides refocusing your label reading and cross contamination rules in the house, is the budget factor. It always seems as soon as I am getting the hang of the diet restrictions a change occurs and now I am going through the pantry again reading all I can to make sure there is not something else I need to change or throw away. NOw this time it is much easier. Nothing changes in the sense of throwing away. We can still eat the gluten free things but now we can add back the wheat component which is going to make things so much easier and much more budget friendly.

Another component to our crazy schedule is I will be heading off to Hawaii and my kids will be staying in Texas with my sister for 3 weeks. So instead of Kae stories and Food and homeschooling, It will be more a glimpse of paradise and self-reflection. When ever I go on a trip with hubby I take that time to get my life focused on God and to evaluate my relationship with Him, how I am doing at home as a wife, teacher and mom.  So unless something truly amazing happens between now and the time I leave I might not be on as much :).



My Cleaning God Fairy has come! Well with a catch…..

I am sure most of you can remember my post on ” Do not Covet Your Neighbors Home”. I have to say since I posted, I have received some great advice through email, Facebook, and here as well. So, did all the advice get me off cleaning my home ….drum roll… IT DID! But, (huh oh disclaimer) it also had me searching for things to help me truly get organized and accomplish my dream of running my home like a well oiled machine. I have to say everyone’s advice was wonderful and knowing I am not the only one who struggles with a dirty house made me feel like all is not lost :).

So why am I calling this one the Cleaning GOd Fairy has come? Well due to my sister sending me a sample of a book she bought Motivated Mom’s I started looking for Apps that would help me organize my house. Honestly with all the meals I cook for different food allergies, a child with learning disabilities,SPD  and NLVD, and homeschooling I do not have the time to add another long task of making a chore chart for each member of the house. Also me trying to build a spread sheet would be like asking a monkey to do my taxes, honestly the monkey might win!  I truly loved the sample my sister sent me on Motivated Mom’s but a paper check list is just one more thing I have to keep up with, print and throw away at the end of the day. Well  it just ends up Motivated Mom’s  now has an app for Iphone and Android called MOMO ( I do not get any kick back for  mentioning this app this is truly just info sharing ) 

This App gets my 5 Stars  for organizing a chaotic life!  Each day there are daily chores, which you can assign to certain people by color, and then there are chores that are done ever so often in a rotation. Each day you open it up and you do just what is on the list. For example. Today I was to clean the windows, sweep the 1st floor, take 10 minutes in each room for a tidy pick up. Then there were the daily tasks. Unload dishwasher , load, do a load of laundry fold put away, sweep kitchen and entry before bed, wipe down counters and kitchen sink. Then there is an area where you can add tasks that you want others to do daily, monthly, weekly, bi weekly and so on. So, daily Yang and Yin are to pick up anything that belongs to them and take it upstairs, tidy room, make beds in morning, unload dishes, put all school books in bin and clean up any school projects, spend 15 min each with the dog , Yang 30 minutes with Chica daily and Yin daily feed Milo. Every other day I have them wiping down the bathrooms with cleaning wipes and Yang weekly has to clean Chica’s cage.

Since I have this on their Ipad’s I keep all the chores on it so they can see the ratio of chores MOmmy does vs chores they do. THis has helped a lot with the talking back and the ” If we do all this what do you do?” snotty comments all kids give. Let me tell you it has been almost 2 weeks and the house is starting to come together. They other aspect I like is, when your house is a bit chaotic you get overwhelmed. You have to say to yourself I am going to do the list and by the end of the year it will be done! THen you start over and each time it should get easier. I can honestly say this was an App well spent! The app is $7.99 I think it is the most expensive app I have bought besides my journal, and it will be the most used. No longer do the kids need to ask what has to be done it is there for them daily and I no longer look at the house as an endless pit of despair but a doable project in the making. It also feels great to touch the screen and check off the chore and have it go to the bottom as done! Wow what a great feeling for all of us!

Now like all apps this is not perfect. You will need to take the time to customize it for your house needs. Also I have not found a function to sync all the Ipad’s. I had to go into each one individually and create what I created on mine. There maybe a way and I just did not see it, but be warned there is a bit of work. It took me a day to set it up and nightly I look at the next day to make sure I don’t want to assign a task to someone.  But, compared to letting monkeys do my taxes, a day was nothing :). So how is this the Cleaning God Fairy! I finally have an organized way to get my house clean. My husband is happy with the progress he has seen, and I am not exhausted and frustrated at the end of the day. So you ask What is the Catch? Well there is not bippity bobbity boo  and the house  is clean. Like Cinderella there is limitation, it does cost $7.99 and I still have to do the work myself, but now the list seems more doable and that in its self a bit a magic.


I challenge You To Tough Love! A Revelation from God on Discipline.

WOW, It has been busy here and I have so many things I want to share, but they will have to wait till a later date :). Today God has put it on my heart to focus a bit on discipline.

Disciplining a NVLD child, a child with Aspie’s, a child with special needs or really any child  can be very tricky. I have been praying and asking God to help me in this area. Kae is very dramatic and is highly intelligent. So much, I don’t even know if we have tapped into how smart she truly is. With knowing that I know that not all of her behavior issues are from her disabilities, some are just plain old  manipulation.

One of the things we are working on in all the therapies we attend is, what is behavior vs disabilities. How do I know when she is over stimulated and having a meltdown due to her Sensory Processing Disorder? How do I know when she is truly not understanding the world and is acting out or being rude due to NVLD and not just being a typical kid with an attitude? How do I know when she is truly struggling with a school task or a Chore task and is melting down, screaming,or avoiding it due to ADHD, Sensory, NLVD and all of it combined vs rebellion of a child not wanting to do what they want to do? These are questions I truly have been struggling with. How do you discipline a child who has so many Neurotransmitters firing in the wrong direction? How can you tell Disability from Behavior?

I honestly can say I had no clue where to start and I was seeing my little girl growing up wild and the manipulation, behavior, and disabilities were running the show. I found myself on my knees asking , more like begging God, to help me! THe professionals where not giving me answers. No one was helping me to figure this out because honestly, they did not know either. THe Therapist are all stumped there were no books dealing with this type of issue that i have found. And well  Yin is good! She has truly got manipulation down pat. SO, Now what? How am I to raise a child to be a contribution to society, not be selfish, and understand what it means to think of others beside herself. SHe does not mean to be that way, but her instincts are to be selfish. Just like your’s or mine is. We just have learned through trial and error, the worlds responses to our behavior, how we are accepted by others, and through discipline that was appropriate to the situation. SHe can not process 3 out of the 4 of those reasons on how we learned. SHe only has me and the discipline I give her to understand all of it.

God tells us that we are born into sin Genesis 8:21 states that “…even though his heart is always directed toward what is evil. His thoughts are evil from the time he is young.” also in Proverbs 22:15 “Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child”. So when our children are born they are born into sin. We see this from the beginning , NO!,  is one of the first words that kids will learn. Testing their boundaries and disobeying is one of the first acts a child starts when they can finally start moving. Children are not innocent they need a savior just as much as we do. But how do you teach a child about God and what is good through discipline? How do you teach a child who doesn’t even process the world right and lives in their own understanding, desires and wants what is right and what is wrong?

The next verses God revealed to me confirmed to me that something needed to be done. Did you know that God states that if you do not discipline your children and raise them up right that you HATE THEM! Proverbs 13:24 ” Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.” This verse Shocked me! I did not hate my child! But, How am I to do this without abuse! Now I am being honest here. Disciplining her for something that she has no control over and is not able to control would be abuse, but not disciplining her for her manipulation would mean that I hate her and that I did not love her enough to figure it out, that I was too tired/stressed to try , or that the world’s view of “they can’t help it and how could you” means more to me than the well-being of my child and the commandment that God gives me as a parent.

I was stumped, I was on my knees praying for God to show me the way and this week He has opened my eyes. Through prayer and reading about parenting in scripture I believe God is revealing to me the uniqueness of Yin. The beautiful way that she has been woven. The complex tapestry of emotions, insight , and the intricacies that she has to a world that none of us see.

The first  bible verses that I came across was Proverbs 23:13-15 ” Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you strike him with a rod, he will not die. If you strike him with the rod, you will save his soul from Shelo. My son, if your heart is wise, my heart too will be glad. ” Next God gave me Hebrews 12:11 ” For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.”

These verses gave me strength. It is hard to see the pain that your child has just living in a world they do not understand and the idea of making more pain seems cruel but not to teach her would be even curler. So the last couple days have been hard on Yin. I have taken away all of her safety nets. The most important one her brother. Yang has always tried to keep Yin from getting in trouble. He deals with the temper-tanturms as well and just does not want another one in his day. He sometimes cries hearing her go through them because there is nothing he can do to help. But, yesterday night I told him he was no longer allowed to be her keeper. He was only to help her when he was given the okay. He was to help in the world but not at home. That way Yin could make mistakes and learn from them. I can say Yang was not happy and he understood that she needed to learn to behave but this was not going to be easy for him. He has gotten to the point where he watchers her so close she can not breath without him being there nagging her. It is a large part of the conflict and resentment between the two of them. I could tell in some ways he was relieved to hear that he was not responsible for her actions and that he was free to let her make mistakes. But, on the other side he was nervous he loves his sister and does not want her life to be harder than it already is.

So as I have been studying, God has been revealing to me Yin’s behavior, Yin is going through a hard adjustment time. Right now she is very angry at God, Me and Yang. She feels like we are making her life harder. In a way I guess we are but it is for the better. I have made a list of her responsibilities ( which I will share on another day.) and if not completed there is a consequence. The Rod comes in many forms, no DS, No Xbox, No Tv  spanking a child with sensory issues just does not work. It would cause confusion and would not be efficient for teaching. Not every child needs to be spanked and the word “rod” can be taken as any type of punishment that works. Key word is works. For example if your child is put in a time out and sits there singing and playing in the corner that is probably not the best disciplinary action :). Grounding a child to his/her room full of toys and they go off to play what ever is in there again not doing much. God has been showing me how to handle Yin in a positive way the last couple days and I have been amazed at seeing His promises for filled.

Lately Yin has been stalling on starting school. Yesterday she had lost mind craft for a week and she took the discipline really well. Then she lost the X box because she did not get off when the timer went off to start school again. She again took that one well and understood. There were clear cut rules and she understood that A + B= C but today she decided she was done with this new way of life. Today she decided that instead of starting her school she was going to use her Ipad to watch TV. She comes downstairs after telling me she was starting Science and I asked ” Are you bringing me your Science to go over” Her face was blank for a minute and then she started telling me lies about how she did not feel well and how she got distracted once upstairs. ” What have you been doing Kae for the last 30 minutes?”  She was holding her Ipad and said with a pouty look with a hint of so what behind it ” Watching TV.” I calmly took her Ipad and explained that is was school time and she new that. I reminded her that she told me she was doing school. I then deleted all video ability from her Ipad. The Horror that came next was enough to shake the house. There was screaming ,flailing stomping, running upstairs to her room and it went on for 2 hrs. I can tell you the house was in an uproar. Yang was upset from all she was screaming and all the crying. It was also hard for him to do school. My heart was aching wondering what all was going on in her mind. How was she processing what had happen. I sat downstairs in my chair and prayed. I prayed for the Holy Spirit to handle Yin. I was doing my job as a parent to raise her up in God’s way. We had just had a bible lesson before all of this talking about how God calls me to discipline when they do wrong and that They are called to listen and obey their parents. That God says that those who learn from correction are wise and those who don’t are fools. So as we waited the 2hrs to pass and I wondered what she would be like when she came out of her melt down I prayed. To my surprise she one did not fall asleep, secondly she came down with a her chewy necklace in her mouth and sat calmly on the couch for a while. She told me she was sorry and asked for lunch. There was a peace in the air. A peace that we have not had in this house for a long time. God said in Hebrews there would be a peaceful fruit and there was today. She finished the rest of her school without struggle for the first time in months. She was happy and content. I know that our battle has just begun on the discipline side but truly I believe I can do anything through Christ my Lord who strengthens me. I believe He will keep unravelling the the complex strings that are wound up in such a way to make Yin who she is. He will help me to break through into her world and show her who He is and teach Her how much He loves her. Right now she does not truly believe in God. She can not see him or touch him and that is hard. But through each promise He gives us I know He will reveal Himself in a way I can not even explain. In a way that her mind will understand and her Faith will flourish. God photopromises that if we discipline our children and bring them up in His ways they will not turn their back on what they are taught Proverbs 22: 6. I know that God keeps his promises. I think the key to any child in learning about God and the world is through righteous discipline. Kids crave it, they want the structure, and as parents it is our duty to teach them . So I challenge you to Tough Love! I  see so many kids runny wild around the children’s hospital and therapy places. I see the tired looks on all the parents faces but I challenge all the parents who have children with special needs. Pray for God to reveal to you how to discipline your child. There is no one case fits all solution each child is unique and it begins with trust. Trusting that God loves you and your family enough to show you how its done.

I know that my quest to teach Yin is just beginning and I know that it will be heartbreaking and a struggle to keep this up. For some reason I find it harder to discipline her than Yang. Maybe because he understands learns and does not repeat usually what he has done wrong on the most part. Yin will forget, she will challenge like a toddler challenges, she will keep me on my toes probably until the day she leaves the house as an adult. But, I am ready for that Challenge and Thank GOd I do not have to rely on my on strength to do it.

If you would like me to pray with you about disciplining a child with special needs or a strong willed child leave a comment. I would be honored to pray for you and your family..


Wonderful Yin Christmas!

Sorry it has taken so long to tell you about what we did for Yin for Christmas. I first wanted to make sure that they were going to be as good as we hoped and some of what we tried had to go back. But, we did have a few winners.

1) The top choice for Yin was the TRAPEZE:  My husband and I decided it would be great to give Yin an inside trapeze. We did not go fancy just one of the ones that you would connect to a swing set. We did not want to do a traditional trapeze like the ones at therapy for safety Imagereasons. This  I will have to say has been a great help. It makes her use all her muscles and has that swinging effect that she likes when she wants something to calm her down. Today was our first day back to school from the holidays and even though we are only doing a partial day ( trying to get her back in slowly) the trapeze has been a huge aid. For the first time ever while having a problem in her Reading lesson Yin excused herself to the basement to swing. We did not have a melt down or a temper tantrum. She was able to go down stairs and workout the energy that was building up inside and the frustration. She then came back with a few tears to get started but nothing like we have ever had before.

2) THE KINECT: Now I know I did the whole post on no electronics but Hubby and I were trying to come up with a way to get us all moving. The Wii was not doing the job. The kids had learned to cheat the Wii movements while sitting down. The only thing they were working out were their wrists.  So as we were shopping I saw the Kinect, and I have been really wanting one. I wanted something to make us all move. Hubby and I debated for a long time but finally he gave in, since there was room in the budget and I had to promise to get rid of the Wii ( I was fine with that since the Wii just upgraded their system and it was going to cost just as much to get the upgrade if we wanted any more new games). So i packed up the Wii after Christmas took it to a Gamestop got 60% my trade being a member and a special they were running and now we have a nice selection of Kinect games. I only allowed each of them to pick one sit down game for right now. They still have the rule of reading a chapter a day before they are allowed any electronics and they have to read at bed time.

Of the Kinect games, our favorites so far are The Advengers , THe Starwars Kinect, and Wipe Out. My kids are really not too much into the dancing ones but I do find them to give a great work out. I truly like the Biggest Loser since I am so out of shape it has been a great one to start with.   Yin works real hard to get school and reading done to play the Kinect.  She has also calmed down quite a bit and has been able to make better choices with her impulse control. I would have to say I do not regret this electronic purchase. I look forward to finding more Kinect games.  Even I am enjoying being a super hero!

3)THE RANGE: Yes you heard me right. We have made a BB gun and Archery Range in our basement. YIN loves weapons and to be able to pull a bow takes a lot of upper body strength. SHe also has to calm herself to be able to hit the target. She is getting to work with her obsession with weapons in a controlled safe way. FOr a long time we took all types of weapons from her. The toys made her violent and out of control. By using real weapons and focusing on the safety and dangers she has really been able to adapt and show the ability to listen and focus while getting to truly appreciate what it means to use a weapon. As for the BB gun she is doing great. She is learning all the range terminology Eyes and Ears at all time, Range hot, range Cold, Load and make Ready, Ready, Stand By, Fire, Unload and show Clear. She is doing great going through the motions and her focus is improving. She needs someone with her at all times to help, but the training has been great and I feel great that she is learning Gun safety.

The rest of her Christmas was  some normal toys and they have been nice for a good change of pace. But as usual the toys are only a short lived distraction and she really just likes to look at things then play with them. Her top toy was Buzz Lightyear. She likes toys that interact with her when she wants them too. With all of his buttons and voice commands he has become a regular guess at our dinner table. She got the horse Honey from her Granna which she loves to brush and feed. It makes noises and moves it head so she feels like it is responding. She also got a large stuffed Zebra from Granna and she loves it ! She actually Imagepretends it is real and can sit on it. She loves to brush it as well and it sleeps right next to her bed with the new Dreamlight. All in all I think she made out like a bandit. And Hubby and I are still researching ideas for gifts down the road. The major thing is she needs a variety of active Gross Motor skill activities to help her be in control. She does not understand the world around her and even her own emotions but now she has a way to let those feeling out and it gives her for the first time a sense of control in her environment.

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Popping the New Year Resolution Bubble!

Well it is the beginning of a New Year! As the  ball drops and we begging to sing the song by Robert Burns, some of us begin thinking of all the people who have gone from our lives possibly friends we have not been able to keep in touch with, but most of us are think about the friends that we call New Years Resolutions! The not so great friends (habits) we struggled with in the last year and want to change this year. I have never been one to buy in to New Years Resolutions. I find them to be promises that are too hard to keep from all the rules and restrictions we put around them to make them perfect. This year for some reason, I find myself thinking about all the things I would like to be doing different. Not sure if it’s the tradition of the New Year or the idea that this is a clean slate, but I can not keep my mind from trying to make lists of what I hope this year could be like.


As I look at this past year I can truly say there have been some major parts of my life I could defiantly improve on.  I am sure many of you will be able to relate with most of them. I would like to make time for myself to read my bible more. I am always saying I don’t have time, but truly if I look at the hours,  I do searching the Web or playing MindCraft on the computer ( yes I love mindcraft, the kids and I are addicted to it and waste tons of time) I would have gotten through the bible twice by now. I would love a cleaner house with more organization, I would like to drop 80 pounds, have healthier meals for the kids and healthier snacks everyday, Exercise at least 5 times a week, and build some more relationships outside of family for the kids and I. These all seem like reasonable and typical News Resolutions. Nothing mind-boggling or any huge discoveries. Just a list of “ I would like to change” running ramped in my head. So, how to go about these wonderful changes without making them the typical New Year Empty Promises to be broken within a short period of time? I have no Idea! I am at a complete loss HA!


I find that Some of us who make New Year Resolutions every year with great intent and plans seem to fall short and just give up. I have to say I am one of those types. I am a perfectionist. I set the goals too high and I make it impossible to achieve any goal I set out to make. The rules on success that I create are too high for anyone to achieve. The expectations of what I see as perfect are popped into a million pieces within the first week causing a spiral of frustrated reactions ending with the decision  that it is easier to give up then to deal with the disappointment of another failed attempt to change. So how do I go about trying to achieve all my desires for this year? I think I have come up with a plan I can deal with. I am not making  any expectations! I will not make a plan that can’t be broken. I will face each day as itself, look at my list and tackle it one day at a time. If a day does not go smoothly, no big deal. What I accomplish is great and I will learn from it. Like every year I am not going to make a New Years Resolution for each of the items on my list. Those wonderful ideas  that are running ramped in my brain are just bubbles of failures ready to be popped by my inability to make reasonable goals.  My First Ever New Years Resolution is going to be the plan not to plan. I will  think of each day as an isolated event. I will be  thinking/praying about my list  and just see if I take it one day at a time, just maybe I can make a few positive changes this year. Making a few changes each year is going to be better than never achieving anything at all. I figure you can’t pop a bubble of expectations if there is no bubble to pop LOL!  HAppy New Year Everyone!




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IMG_1573I just wanted to Shoot out  a , Happy New Year!! And we also pray you all had a wonderful Christmas! We had a great day with family  and are enjoying the kids having fun with their new toys. I look forward to sharing a few of the ideas we came up with to make our day easier and ways to keep the kids active through the winter I will say we did break down and buy one electronic device a Kinect X box. As you can see from our family photo, we have all found a hobby to do as a family and even went out to the range on Christmas to try our new toys :).  Looks like we are getting a good snow for a while and the kids are excited to get out and play :). YIN was extremely excited to see it snowing and could not wait to get all dressed and go out to make snow angels. I might not be posting for a bit due to Hubby being home, and taking some well enjoyed family time. But I look forward to the new year and all the fun times/learning curves I hope to share. So Happy New Year Everyone may your days be full of joy, laughter, and Love!

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When all Hits the Fan What Then…….

Today was one of those days. I could go on for pages telling you the woe’s of my day the temper tantrums I dealt with, flailing of the arms and legs , screaming, cuddling and rocking that was done to keep one safe from harm. Not sure what was so hard about today, except that we had to clean and the weather outside was yucky. The wind was shaking the house and the rain kept her from her plans to have an airsoft war with her brother.  I guess all of that was enough to throw us into a tailspin. So, what do you do when the you know what hits the fan? You make Forts. That’s right you make tents and cozy forts so that your child can have a safe hideaway, somewhere small and cozy and just her size to keep her safe from all the scary sounding wind. THen you clean around her doing her room so that you can get it done. When she needs a moment you rock her and sing and then you put her back in the fort for some quiet time. Bathrooms can wait another day! My little girl needed a Fort Day! ( Now you know why nothing ever gets done here LOL!)

What do you do for dinner when you spend your day making forts… TACOS! I can always rely on tacos when my little YIN is stressed. It is one meal that she loves and will not fight me on eating. Forts and Taco’s life does not get much better than that. :

Taco seasoning mix

2 Tbs Chili Powder

1/2 Tsp garlic powered

1/2 Tsp onion Powder

1/2 Tsp of Mexican Oregano ( reg oregano is fine)

1/4 tsp dried cilantro leaves

1/4 Tsp of chipolte powder ( no chipolte red peppers flakes work well just miss the smokey flavor)

1 Tsp of paprika

3 Tsp of ground Cumin

1 Tsp of sea salt

1 tsp of ground grains of paradise ( or black pepper)

2 lbs of ground beef, pork, chicken or turkey

8 0z of tomato sauce

Cook your meat drain set aside ( You can do the meat in a crock pot and use a potato masher to break up the meat when you get home. Make sure you drain off all fat or it will be very greasy before adding the seasoning and tomato.) .

Put all the dry ingredients in a bullet/blender and mix well. This makes enough for two batches of meat. I like my taco meat to be well seasoned so you might want to use half and then add more if you need it. Sprinkle the meat with seasoning and mix until all is well coated and you can start to smell the aroma of the spices being released from the heat. THen add the tomato sauce. Stir and cook for about 1-2 minutes until the tomato sauce picks up the taco seasoning and is well blended.

I like using tomato sauce instead of water because it makes it nice and thick. Most commercial brands have dried tomatoes in their packets and use cornstarch to thicken. I find  that the tomato sauce does the job and add a nice rich homemade flavor. Once you’ve made this you will never go back to pre packaged seasoning mix again :).

I hope you enjoy!